Addressing common self-esteem issues: Issue #9

Over the next few weeks, I am looking at common thoughts that people with low self-esteem have, found within this Buzzfeed article, and how we can possibly address them. For the full list, click here.

buzzfeed 9

When you don’t have a high opinion of yourself, it becomes very challenging to believe that others like you. Even if people do all the things that someone who likes you would do – inviting you out, sending you friendly messages, being kind and generous – your low self-esteem can lead to you shutting those people out. Unfortunately, you cannot believe that someone will like you when you do not like yourself.

So what can you do to start believing others genuinely like you?

  • Do not shut people out. If you refuse a friendly invite, or ignore a text just because you do not believe a person can genuinely like you, you are making your self-esteem issues much worse. You need to test the crazy theory you have in your head that these friendly people don’t like you. Accept their invites, reply to their texts…if the person didn’t like you, it will be pretty obvious.
  • Challenge your negative thinking. You need to challenge your negative thoughts head on. Is there any evidence that this person doesn’t like you? Read this article on how to start challenging your negative thinking, and this article about finding alternate perspectives to negative thoughts.
  • Focus on self-improvement. Rather than comparing yourself to others, one way to raise self-esteem is to focus on making yourself the best version of YOU possible. Do all the things you love, set goals you want to achieve and find physical activities you enjoy to take care of your body and health.
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