31 Days of Wellbeing: Day 15

Day 15 of 31 Days of Wellbeing

This is probably the hardest mental activity to do so far. We are often told to make a list of our strengths as part of a wellbeing challenge, but in Fearne Cotton’s ‘Happy: Journal’ book, I was asked to do something completely opposite, which was scary but actually a useful activity!

Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring. Marilyn Monroe

Yes, I am asking you to think about your imperfections. Be honest about what you think your shortcomings are. However, a couple of rules! Firstly, remember you are your worst critic. If your friend was to make a list of your shortcomings, they would probably struggle to think of one, so don’t freak out if your mental list of flaws is long.

Secondly, as you think of an imperfection, try to make peace with it. Accept that you are not perfect. Does anybody actually like a person with no flaws? Does that person even exist? It isn’t a person I could get on with! Flaws are relatable, remember. Try to think of a positive point from the flaw as well, e.g. perhaps you are over-emotional but that could also be a sign that you care, which is lovely!

Here are a few from my list:

  • Oversensitive (positive: I am a big softie really who cares too much)
  • Passive-agressive (positive: I hate confrontation and avoid scary fights)
  • Quiet in big groups and meetings (positive: I listen well and it would be a problem if everybody in a group is loud and overbearing)
  • Untoned thighs (positive: I am very relatable, a lot of women suffer from this from what I hear!)

I will stop there…you don’t want to go on and on with this list because that will eventually make you feel rubbish! But think of 4-5 and the key to healthy wellbeing is to learn to accept these imperfections and see them in a more positive light.

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Boost of the Day #116: Change your reflection

If you make peace with the mirror you will see your reflection change.

Make sure you look at yourself as a whole person when you look at your reflection. Normally, we look immediately for our imperfections when we look at a mirror. Instead, take a step back and look at your complete self.

Focus on the good, and accept the flaws. Your flaws do not define you, they are part of a much wider, more beautiful picture.

Boost of the Day #96: Defining beauty

Beauty is not in the face;

I wish we would all take note of the above message.

I’m all for making yourself look good on the outside because that shows you’re taking care of yourself. You deserve to spend time making yourself look your best. Focusing on inner beauty certainly doesn’t mean rolling around in your sweats and greasy hair every day!

However, if your hair is perfectly coiffed and your body doesn’t show an ounce of fat, but you’re dissatisfied with life and miserable, that is not beauty. On the other hand, if you have no make up on, have been running around with your dog outside and you’re feeling amazing, beauty is going to shine from you.

Nothing to do with your looks, all to do with your attitude and heart.

Men and body image

Another great article from Buzzfeed here:

Click here for the article.

Main points I took from this:

  • Worrying about weight, body tone, skin problems, baldness and so on is not just an issue for women. Men go through just the same problems.
  • The images of men in the media are powerful and can really affect the way men feel about their bodies. There are not many men in the media with physical flaws, in fact I think the situation is far worse than on the female side, where flaws are beginning to be embraced more.
  • In dating and relationships, don’t assume a potential partner is that concerned about how your body looks. They might be intimidated by a perfect body, and other parts of you are normally far more important.
  • And my favourite point of the article…embrace your flaws. Great line from the article: ‘Who would you rather be around, the person who is light and breezy and witty, or the person who takes themselves way too seriously?’ If you’re constantly concerned about your appearance, you’re missing out on opportunities to get to know people because you’ll be so preoccupied with yourself. Focus on others, having fun and your other great qualities.